After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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