Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
