just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
