I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Randomize