someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
