He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
