If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Hippo gnu deer
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize