I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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