O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
