I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
