Don't you send me to vm
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I will pee on everything he values.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
