sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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