God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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