problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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