:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize