Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
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