He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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