he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize