I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize