I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
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