There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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