How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
