does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
He shit in the fireplace
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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