are you still at the devil's house?
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
