I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Randomize
