The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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