I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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