It's Friday. Sex?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
