you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
