if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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