I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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