Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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