week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
