i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
