Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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