Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
