She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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