She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
