I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
