Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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