I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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