i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
