How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize