"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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