I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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