Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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