I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
