there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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