i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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