giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
