It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
